Ok call me 'lame', but I have been watching MAFS, yes Marriage at First Sight. There. I admitted it... Embarassing.
Not the usual thing for me to watch these reality TV shows. I'm usually an ABC, SBS girl but I have to say this one had me hooked.... just a bit.
Not because I thought it was great or that I wanted to find out who would find true love... Because I was astounded at the dynamics of the relationships - the betrayals, the dramas and most of all, the way the women behaved.
In fact, I was APPALLED! ....
Last year was devastating for me. Tragedy struck my family. But I showed up.
It was traumatic. I showed up. It was dramatic. I showed up.
In a year that should have been a massive celebration with the launch of my first book, I was in the trenches. I still showed up. My nervous system took a shattering. Eventually I realised I had post traumatic stress. I rested. I retreated. I had to. And then I still showed up.
Souls have been ravaged by far worse tragedy than mine, and they are SS. Still standing...
"I knew this all along but I didn't trust it", she said, with her eyes welling up with tears, both in disbelief and in relief.
For how many years had she abandoned herself? Ten, twenty, thirty?
If only she knew then what she knows now. Would it, could it have been any different?
It's as if this something was already hidden within her body, within her very genetics. They knew. The body knew.
I was just in Zurich some years ago and I found myself with half an hour to wait to meet my partner downstairs outside our hotel.
The hotel was by the river Limmat, and outside were lovely little tables right on the river where the Swiss enjoy their drinks and coffees.
Instead though, I decided to go back upstairs and use the time to lie on the bed and relax - and...
How I Wish
Back in 1998, life was changing for me. I was 37. My son was going into high school. We'd sold our business of 13 years, I was embarking on a new career in counselling, psychotherapy and creative arts therapy, and had pretty deep depression.
They say that counsellors go into this work, because they need it the most! Yep, that was me. But I also loved the creative process of the work.
Little did I know that the symptoms of depression, mood swings, disinterest in sex and general malaise were a few significant signposts that heralded peri-menopause. At 37! I remember when one doctor pronounced, 'yes you are peri-menopausal'. Peri what? What does that mean?
Women so often are in a cloud when it comes to changes in the body, symptoms that don't make sense and feelings that we wish we didn't have. That's why it is SO important to know our bodies, so we can be informed and possibly bypass some of the symptoms and also so we can feel like we are not going crazy.
We live in interesting times ...
I remember the early 90's, sitting in the Lyric Theatre in Brisbane, when the evocative Canadian Celtic singer, Loreena McKennit walked on stage. She had two sets of gigantuan candelabras either side of the stage, topped with huge thick candles, alighting the space with dramatic overtones. She walked in with her long golden hair and sat at her massive sculptural masterpiece of a harp. I felt transported to a heavenly realm and moved to tears by her mesmerising music and haunting vocals, and then... she began to speak.
"Tomorrow is a big day," she said. "The World Wide Web will open. It's the day that is going to change the world." She seemed to know what it would mean.
He didn't think it would be this way...
It was that one thing she said.
Shame had coursed through his veins so hard that day. It was unbearable.
Shame at his own natural urges, his own simple desire for love, his own yearning for her soft sweet skin against his. And now it had turned to...
“I don't want to make love with you anymore.”
It’s a statement that’s been heard by many a devastated man or woman, perhaps more often than not; the bombshell that explodes dreams, and cuts to the very core of anyone’s self-worth.
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Have you ever thought about how much your mind is involved in sex and making love? Because we are completely immersed in something physical, we are generally not aware how much we ARE thinking and WHAT we are thinking.
It's not until we move our awareness from mind to body, that we can go more into what we are feeling, doing and being.
Described as a...
Resonating with this?
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