How I Wish
Back in 1998, life was changing for me. I was 37. My son was going into high school. We'd sold our business of 13 years, I was embarking on a new career in counselling, psychotherapy and creative arts therapy, and had pretty deep depression.
They say that counsellors go into this work, because they need it the most! Yep, that was me. But I also loved the creative process of the work.
Little did I know that the symptoms of depression, mood swings, disinterest in sex and general malaise were a few significant signposts that heralded peri-menopause. At 37! I remember when one doctor pronounced, 'yes you are peri-menopausal'. Peri what? What does that mean?
Women so often are in a cloud when it comes to changes in the body, symptoms that don't make sense and feelings that we wish we didn't have. That's why it is SO important to know our bodies, so we can be informed and possibly bypass some of the symptoms and also so we can feel like we are not going crazy.
We live in interesting times ...
I remember the early 90's, sitting in the Lyric Theatre in Brisbane, when the evocative Canadian Celtic singer, Loreena McKennit walked on stage. She had two sets of gigantuan candelabras either side of the stage, topped with huge thick candles, alighting the space with dramatic overtones. She walked in with her long golden hair and sat at her massive sculptural masterpiece of a harp. I felt transported to a heavenly realm and moved to tears by her mesmerising music and haunting vocals, and then... she began to speak.
"Tomorrow is a big day," she said. "The World Wide Web will open. It's the day that is going to change the world." She seemed to know what it would mean.
When you are a tired and busy mum, who gets time for intimacy?
As a Mum and now Grandmother, I can totally relate.
Around the time of the book launch of Tantric Sex and Menopause, I babysat my two adorable grand girls quite a lot, aged 2 and 3. Yep, young ones...
And I had them overnight for the first time. And since, many times...
well... any parent or grand parent will know ...
A reading from Tantric Sex and Menopause.
EMBODIMENT: From Womb Wilderness to Womb Wildness
Many women have little to no awareness of the womb, this miraculous life giving uterus with its capactiy to hold space for an embryo. It is said for it's size, it is pound for pound the strongest muscle in the female body. A small facinating organ tucked up safetly in the pelvis.
A reading from Tantric Sex and Menopause. CHAPTER 8: Going Deep, Going Slow, Going Wild
Many menopausal women and peri-menopausal women feel such a lack of desire for sex that they feel totally disheartened (not all women, it just depends on our make up). They concerned they are not living up to the image that a sexy and alive woman should feel like. Let's talk more about going wild...
Your body is not broken... A reading from Tantric Sex and Menopause.
Your body is not broken, as each woman's journey through menopause is individual - it is impossible to make all embracing statements about it. At the same time, women share in common many highly significant aspects of menopause - so sharing information with others can really empower women through this time.
One of the major challenges that women face in menopause and peri menopause is their desire for sex.
I had a call recently from a dear woman who has enjoyed a healthy and loving sex life for years with her husband. Now, in menopause, she was devastated as she said that sex was too painful.
It's reassuring to know for both partners that this is not uncommon. But also it doesn't have to be this way.
Menopause can be a time of huge change for a woman. AND her love partner!
As the common symptoms intensify, women who have been so capable and successful in their career and mothering roles can find themselves floundering in the uncharted waters of uncontrollable emotion.
She can feel so tired that she becomes as irritable as a bear guarding her lair. And the rising heat of hot flushes at night...
Menopause can be a powerful and transformational gateway into the next stage of a woman’s life if she is willing to accept with grace the changes taking place within her body.
It’s a time of transition, physically, emotionally and spiritually, a time of stepping into a new phase of life. This is often a time when life circumstances push us to make the change we’ve been avoiding for years.
It’s a time when women can feel quite broken emotionally and result in a deep lack of self-worth, even self-hatred for not living up to the expectations of society, peers, family or self.
Resonating with this?
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