The sweetest thing happened recently.
My mother just turned 90. As she gets older, I notice a gentleness growing more and more in her. To hug her is like hugging a feather. She is so incredibly 'light' now. Though small in stature, her heart and compassion have widened. Something I noticed in my dad as he grew older too.
As a few of us were sitting around the morning after her birthday...
Sometimes I think I'm just way too sensitive for this world. But if you're reading this, maybe you feel that too.
I don't think any of us are out of the firing line of loss, grief, or trauma right now, whether that is personal, communal, or universal. And all these affect our relationships deeply.
There's a dismantling, a shattering, a shaking of our foundations, that is so collective, none of us...
Recently I sat down with Shae Elise Allen from ‘Midlife Pleasure & Power’ for what was a beautifully dynamic and rich discussion about perimenopause.
Our combined enthusiasm for this topic provided an abundance of key information for women experiencing this transition.
Some of the areas we cover are:
- Corporate sector stigma
- Pleasure in midlife – what does that look like
- The surprising by-product of presence
- Understanding feminine power
- Your personal renaissance – self-care
- Generating your own miracles
- Midlife sex...
I often hear men say, when they speak about sexual intimacy, "It's her problem, not my problem. I want it. She doesn't".
Well, it's not that simple! And it's not her fault, and it's not his fault. There is a lot at play here.
In this video I am primarily speaking to men. But roles can always be reversed. Sometimes it is the man who is retreating from sexual intimacy, so I...
My daughter took this photo in Melbourne early in 2020.
Contemplating my beautiful journey with her as a mother made me think of something that happened as she grew up. To be honest this is a little hard to admit! But for the sake of any woman approaching perimenopause, well, here I go ...
One day when she was 12, and I was 42, I found myself behaving like a crazy woman...
I see it with some women after relationship losses or long periods of being in a relationship.
The pull to be bitter is seductive. If you weaken, you will be sucked into its sticky web.
Don’t do it.
It’s not who you are.
You are love.
And whatever you can do to swim against those waves that want to take you out into that...
'Heartbreak is how we mature. It is as inescapable and inevitable as breathing. Even the longest marriage has it's heartbroken many times, even in the act of just staying together.'
Wise words from one of my favourite contemporary poets, David Whyte.
I see it all the time. A large part of the maturing of a relationship rests on how well we repair from upheavals and disappointments. Some relationships survive it. Others do not.
A wise mentor said to me once, 'A relationship can be for a reason, a season or a lifetime'.
I think the event of birth and it’s subsequent effects on a woman’s body is one of the most underestimated natural disturbances and trauma on the female body and psyche that she may ever have. And on her willingness and physical ability to re-engage in sexual intercourse afterwards.
I cannot count the number of women who have sat with me and said it. 'It all changed after I had children'.
Very early one morning in February I was interviewed by a beautiful couple, Nicola Foster and Jason Porthouse in the UK for their podcast, Intimacy Matters.
I think I am the most relaxed I've ever been in any interview here, having known Nicola before. I'd met Nicola, a Relationship therapist, while attending The Making Love Retreat some 8 years ago in Europe.
We cover a heap of territory from...
To approach the body with sensitivity and awareness is a rare thing and yet it’s what every ‘body’ is craving for.
Touch, with presence. It’s the most life-giving, life-saving resource we can offer to our loved ones and those around us.
Yet, in our society generally, the body just doesn’t receive enough safe, loving, respectful, non-intentional touch.
Touch is the first communication that we have in our world. The power of touch, and...
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