How to be 'Present'?

These days we hear all the time about ‘being present’ and in many ways, it can become such a concept of the mind for the spiritual seeker.

When we move from this seeking of the mind TO THE BODY, we immediately become present. Using the sensations of breath, we are instantly here in the body, therefore in the present. By bringing our attention to the inner subtle sensations of the body, we are being present. Eg. in the Breast Meditation for a woman.

To me, there are two aspects to ‘being present’. One is bringing attention to your body and the other is having no goal. When we begin to bring a goal to what we do then we are immediately out of the present. Having a goal will bring subtle tension to the body, even if unconsciously. So part of having no goal, once you have brought attention to the body is to then relax.

So if you are moving your body to build up to an orgasm, you are subtly moving to a goal (not so present). If you are moving your body instinctively, allowing the sensations to move YOU in an attitude of relaxation, rather than you moving it, then you are being more 'present'.

Being aware of subtle sensations within the body also includes bringing awareness to how emotion sits within the body – in either gross or subtle forms – notice a tightness in any area of the torso. The throat, the neck, the chest, the belly, the womb or groin area, or anywhere in the back – literally any restriction in the body will be a result of stored emotion.

Due to our very busy lives, sometimes pain is the only way we become present in the body! Being present is something that can happen in an instant if we choose it and due to the nature of the mind to want to think, analyze and judge, we can also instantly be pulled ‘out’ of being present. So being present is a constant ‘coming back, coming home to the body’.

In lovemaking, a couple will soar when they continue to come back home to the body through breath awareness, touch, movement and sensation. If you are single, make the time, just the way a couple would, to devote to yourself to 'come home to the body' through your own simple practices such as simply being still, awareness of breathing, feeling sensations in the body through touch and movement... and remembering ... all without a goal!  

P.S Your body is not broken. Menopause is a gateway, a privilege, a time to embrace change with grace and step into a life that is empowered, loving and alive.  This is your birthright as a woman.  You have been waiting for this all your life... Buy my book Tantric Sex and Menopause on Amazon AUS, Amazon US & Amazon UK.